So Michael Jackson died today. I don't have anything against the King of Pop or anything, nor do I really know whether or not he was a bad person. I was telling my friend however, that I found it weird that he is being glorified now since he had all these awful allegations against him while he was alive. But, now he's dead and is deemed as one of most humanitarian celebrities on the planet. And then my friend says, 'well yeah, that's what death does, it just glazes over any of the bad stuff.' And its true, but that doesn't mean it's a bad thing. When you break up with a person you reminisce only on the positives. Our brains tend to want to forget pain. And like the end of a relationship, the loss of a loved one is an opportunity to remember what these people graced us with. Death allows you to cherish people for what they were meant to be on this earth for. It's an opportunity to really cherish what a persons life was meant to be. There are not a lot of universal truths about what happens after we die. Not many people believe we have a soul, not everyone thinks that we move on into an afterlife. Regardless if we have a soul or not, we have a purpose. And when we pass on, the eternal memory that is left with our loved ones is that purpose. And that can only be a beautiful thing that we'll never forget.
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Elfie, what you write is so beautiful and true.
ReplyDeleteWhere people fall into the depths of sadness and despair relating to the loss or death of a loved one, is that they stop at the memory. The memory is the seed of goodness and hope, without which we cannot delve further or go deeper, which I think is so crucial for us to do in order to become protagonists, to see life beyond death, and despair transformed into hope for the future, for ourselves and for others.
Tragedy in death occurs when we think or see that person as the only means or ways to have embodied certain human purity or excellence; when instead, we could see their death as a means to carry forward the loving lessons which they have taught us in life, and valiantly begin to search and pursue our own purpose and excellence, and continue sharing all this with others in true selfless love and companionship: in song, in poem, in writing, in talks.. in life!
As crazy as it might seem, I believe that death can be truly a gift somehow, a gift to make us *pause* and wonder.. not even about the selfish notion of “What is there for me after death? Is there an afterlife in which I will *finally* be happy?” but.. “What is there for me *now*, tomorrow, and the day after that, in *life*? How has this person inspired me, what have I learned from them and what would I like to adopt as my own? How can I best serve others and myself, by paying forward the joy and wonder with which they have filled my heart?” In these questions burns the light of hope, joy, peace..and *true* everlasting life of those we have ‘lost.’ Because we haven’t really lost them, if they always remain in our hearts, as we continue sharing their voice with others who cross our paths, and as they in turn do the same, and so on and so on, tirelessly yet faithfully forward through the elusive mystery of time ;o) We could pay no greater respect to their memory than that!
But also as important is the lesson of how we treated those who have passed away while they were still with us. It is important to re-examine these issues as well, because if we were hurtful, dishonest, sarcastic, apathetic, belittling or ridiculing of them, we need re-evaluate both our humanity and theirs. Somehow I must say, I feel great shame for what has happened to Michael Jackson. I had been a die-hard fan for *such* a long time, and when the scandals starting coming out, I pulled away emotionally. It’s strange, because you don’t even know the person, yet you base judgments on rumours or allegations, and feel somehow personally let down or upset upon discovering the object of your adulation isn’t ‘perfect.’ That is so *completely* wrong on SO many levels, because per your “Day 35 post - flaws,” that’s what makes us human, and in fact what should bring us closer together, not divide us further apart.
ReplyDeleteWhen we start to worship one another, that’s when we start to kill a part of ourselves and the other. On one hand, we base all hope on them, no longer thinking we ourselves have anything to offer (one death); and on the other hand, we are, without realizing it, placing on an icon’s shoulders an implied ‘conditional love,’ impregnated with expectations to ‘perform,’ only so as to sustain our admirations (a second death). Then, when an icon falls, we feel disillusioned, laugh and point, instead of trying to get closer and nearer, to be kinder and gentler, and to offer our hand in help while gratuitously saying, “Here, walk with me.”
Looking back at the terrible and hurtful ways in which we have treated Michael Jackson as a society in terms of mockery and ridicule, I cannot help but feel so wholly ashamed at that aspect of our form. In a way, it feels like we have ALL killed him; killed him with the loneliness and desolation of a cast-away, a throw-away. I cannot presume to have known his heart… but still I wonder.. what if instead of *both* the hurtful tabloids *and* the equally obsessive fans, we had instead tried to see him simply as Michael Jackson, a real human being, a person just like the rest of us, with the ***only*** difference being that he was brave enough to follow his God-given talent to wherever it would lead him…
Funny.. I just read this somewhere online, “Meanhwhile, I just heard the Reverend Al Sharpton on television suggesting Michael died of a broken heart. Fitting, if overly poetic. Life was not kind to Michael.” Funny..that whenever we say, “*Life* isn’t fair” the *real* translation of that is “*People* aren’t fair!” …but “Life isn’t fair” is easier to stomach, because it shrugs off personal responsibility from each of us ;o)) As for the Reverend’s statement being “overly poetic”..I’m not sure there *is* such a thing.. as I believe what each and *every* human being is truly at their core, is simply a poem eagerly and anxiously awaiting and hoping to be deciphered by someone who will take the time – and that’s what *true love* is! ;o) It’s just too bad that so many of us don’t enjoy reading poetry ;o) “Oh, I don’t like this one – NEXT!” ;o)))
ReplyDeleteLet’s hope we can learn from this tragedy, turn it around, and treat those currently in our lives better, more truthfully, humbly and with deeper gratitude for *all* that they have to give and to offer, within the totality of their frailty *and* their glory ;o) Let’s try to stay alert and aware of as many moments as we can, and be unafraid to say to our friends *while* they are still with us, “Thank you!” ;o)))
More and more each day I find that there can be no greater words in any human language than those simple two.. even beyond “I love you”…because without even trying to, “Thank you” together with its equally meaningful counterpart “I’m sorry,” convey with purest depth of meaning “I love you” best! ;o)
So Elfie, thank you for your *marvelous* blog ;o) It’s helping me to stay in front of reality, confirms things I’ve known in my heart for SO long but may not always have consciously articulated to myself or others (or lost faith believing in because others have ridiculed my thoughts when spoken), and pushes me to delve further and further into the meanings and depths of things ;o) And those positive meanings and depths of things so clearly and dearly felt by *each* of us individually, then shared together - *that* is what ultimately constitutes the meaning of LIFE! ;o)
Love, (hugs) & *kisses*,
~alex~ :o)))
p.s. ***FANTASTIC*** graphic you put @ the end of your post!! ;oD :o))) Took me a WHOLE day to get it – LOL! ;oD