#289 being ready

I've been having a hard time recently, trying to make some decisions about my future.  What it is that I want to do? What will ultimately make me happy? I've been in a strange unsettled and restless state since I finished school.  I have no idea what I want to do with my life because I feel as though I've been traveling down the wrong path for a while; one that doesn't provide me with the type of consistent happiness I desire.  And it's really frustrating, because it feels as though whatever decision I make, will sacrifice some aspect that's important to me, but I really want to find it.

Seeing as I'm currently unemployed, I've had a lot of time on my hands to read the pile of books that I either bought out of interest or impulse, or were given to me.  I never was much of a reader, but I've really taken a liking to it lately. I finally started, and almost finished mind you, a book that I probably bought over eight years ago - I know, ridiculous isn't it? But the book I'm reading now, The Alchemist, is basically a story about a boy who's in search of his calling, or as he calls it his Personal Legend. He describes himself as "an adventurer looking for treasure." The book really speaks to me, and there's a quote in it that I can't get out of my head, "When  you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it." It's funny that it's taken me this long to read this book, yet I tried opening it up every now and again, and I just couldn't get into it.  But now, when I need the guidance and assurance, it's there and I'm ready to read it.  So today, I'm thankful for things the fact that I'm finally in a place to really read, understand and digest things that will help me in a personal journey. Things that are often good for you, necessary lessons or tokens that help you on your journey are usually right under your nose. I'm a firm believer that you really can't see things unless you are truly ready, and today I'm thankful that I'm finally at a point where I actually want to make myself happy. It's taken a long time to get here.